I made all these "scribbles" with a light pen, and then cut them up and here's the collage I made with them.
Tuesday, 15 February 2011
Wednesday, 2 February 2011
winter light - 2010
This used to be "gray nude" or somesuch - that was before I expressed myself all over it with Payne's Grey... I thought "noisy" was much better than the very quietly deliberate previous version. However, my tutor deemed it immediately "a disaster" - and in an assessment, too - with 4 other people present.
I didn't take it badly (in fact, I only laughed) - I *did* state before showing it that the Autumn term for me was all about "experimentation" (so it's OK with me if some of my experiments fail horribly).
The only thing is - now I am looking more carefully at this image as I'm cropping it for Flickr... and I wonder to myself, *what* exactly makes this "a disaster"? My tutor has never said anything of the kind in the 4 tutorial sessions, and has only seemed to be encouraging and mentoring during the session - but then he's never given me REAL feedback during the tutorials - instead he has done two things: 1) point out what he thinks is "my way of working/thinking" and 2) suggests artists for me to look at and off I go to the internet or library to try and glean something useful by looking at someone else's artwork.
He's never ONCE said by looking at my projects and any of the 4 times we've met, "This works" or "that doesn't work" (for me, my way of working, for what I'm trying to do, etc.)
So, he's deemed my "expressive brush strokes don't work" (for me) and now I'm a little uncertain about experimenting further, doing things "out of character" (like trying to be LESS controlled, LESS planned, MORE spontaneous etc.) - because I sense he wants me to explore, go deeper in the analytical, logical side of me.
And frankly, I quit the IT biz because I'm *SICK* to death of analysing, being logical and planning ahead.
Hopefully, it's not too late for me, hopefully I can find a balance (and soon!) of free creativity alongside balanced and thoughtful work.
I didn't take it badly (in fact, I only laughed) - I *did* state before showing it that the Autumn term for me was all about "experimentation" (so it's OK with me if some of my experiments fail horribly).
The only thing is - now I am looking more carefully at this image as I'm cropping it for Flickr... and I wonder to myself, *what* exactly makes this "a disaster"? My tutor has never said anything of the kind in the 4 tutorial sessions, and has only seemed to be encouraging and mentoring during the session - but then he's never given me REAL feedback during the tutorials - instead he has done two things: 1) point out what he thinks is "my way of working/thinking" and 2) suggests artists for me to look at and off I go to the internet or library to try and glean something useful by looking at someone else's artwork.
He's never ONCE said by looking at my projects and any of the 4 times we've met, "This works" or "that doesn't work" (for me, my way of working, for what I'm trying to do, etc.)
So, he's deemed my "expressive brush strokes don't work" (for me) and now I'm a little uncertain about experimenting further, doing things "out of character" (like trying to be LESS controlled, LESS planned, MORE spontaneous etc.) - because I sense he wants me to explore, go deeper in the analytical, logical side of me.
And frankly, I quit the IT biz because I'm *SICK* to death of analysing, being logical and planning ahead.
Hopefully, it's not too late for me, hopefully I can find a balance (and soon!) of free creativity alongside balanced and thoughtful work.
Thursday, 27 January 2011
halfway through year 1
I survived my first formal assessment... even when my tutor (one of two in the room) took the session as a learning opportunity for me, confusing "tutorial" with "assessment" missing the point of the session entirely.
Not that feedback is a bad thing, I just felt under the microscope a bit while at the same time, sensing that I was Missing Something Important. There were two other students undergoing assessment at the same time, and so when my "turn" was up it was somewhat of a relief. Then he kept coming back to me with direct and significant comments, so the relief was short-lived.
E.g., the pieces that seemed to "hit the mark" artistically speaking were not paintings at all (a film and a fabric/quilt-y thing) while the painting experiments were deemed a "disaster" (his words, not mine), particularly awful apparently is the one where I tried large, expressive brush marks...
Yet what I *really* want is to be a painter... I don't see myself as a photographer, or a film maker or even one who makes installations... I am stubborn and I want to paint...
So the one helpful thing I took way from the assessment was the comment that the work that *worked* were pieces that I really analysed and followed through logically, maybe even methodically... i.e., made up some kind of *system* (can I say rules maybe?) and then followed the system....
I have to think more about this later, when the builders next door have stopped using loud machines :( :(
Not that feedback is a bad thing, I just felt under the microscope a bit while at the same time, sensing that I was Missing Something Important. There were two other students undergoing assessment at the same time, and so when my "turn" was up it was somewhat of a relief. Then he kept coming back to me with direct and significant comments, so the relief was short-lived.
E.g., the pieces that seemed to "hit the mark" artistically speaking were not paintings at all (a film and a fabric/quilt-y thing) while the painting experiments were deemed a "disaster" (his words, not mine), particularly awful apparently is the one where I tried large, expressive brush marks...
Yet what I *really* want is to be a painter... I don't see myself as a photographer, or a film maker or even one who makes installations... I am stubborn and I want to paint...
So the one helpful thing I took way from the assessment was the comment that the work that *worked* were pieces that I really analysed and followed through logically, maybe even methodically... i.e., made up some kind of *system* (can I say rules maybe?) and then followed the system....
I have to think more about this later, when the builders next door have stopped using loud machines :( :(
Wednesday, 15 December 2010
city map (2010)
60 x 90 cm
cotton duck (canvas), cotton cord, hemp, and silk
This piece is one that I submitted for a critique in the final weeks of the term.
I suppose it might make more sense with some of the other pieces I've also done recently and if I'd taken a better photo (which when I do, it will replace this one).
What I was going for here was the idea of representing a connection or relationship between city and rural (or nature) only not so directly.
With that in mind, I've sketched a city, often composed itself of concrete and steel but in this case, I've alluded to bridges and roads with "natural" materials - hemp knots, and cotton cord, respectively, all stitched onto a cotton canvas fabric. The river then is expressed in silk, a sort of "flowing" fabric that fits the idea of a river - another kind of opposite - where a river is a naturally-occuring thing, silk fabric is a manufactured thing.
In the whole piece there are layers of conflict and tension - the clean, calm, soft "natural" feel of the materials against the idea of a dirty, busy, polluted city... the well-known profile of the river against the anonymous roads... the bridges so distinctive in real-life repeated in the their right locations on the river but with a meaningless sameness (so you could know what each bridge is named though it looks the same as all the others)... the city made to look much like a slice of something quite organic as perhaps skin stiched together and forming a scar...
It may take a moment or two to recognise this map, but once you see what is familiar, you will ALWAYS see it.
It is this idea, this little bit of subterfuge, that I plan to incorporate in the next piece or two... I might be on to something!
cotton duck (canvas), cotton cord, hemp, and silk
This piece is one that I submitted for a critique in the final weeks of the term.
I suppose it might make more sense with some of the other pieces I've also done recently and if I'd taken a better photo (which when I do, it will replace this one).
What I was going for here was the idea of representing a connection or relationship between city and rural (or nature) only not so directly.
With that in mind, I've sketched a city, often composed itself of concrete and steel but in this case, I've alluded to bridges and roads with "natural" materials - hemp knots, and cotton cord, respectively, all stitched onto a cotton canvas fabric. The river then is expressed in silk, a sort of "flowing" fabric that fits the idea of a river - another kind of opposite - where a river is a naturally-occuring thing, silk fabric is a manufactured thing.
In the whole piece there are layers of conflict and tension - the clean, calm, soft "natural" feel of the materials against the idea of a dirty, busy, polluted city... the well-known profile of the river against the anonymous roads... the bridges so distinctive in real-life repeated in the their right locations on the river but with a meaningless sameness (so you could know what each bridge is named though it looks the same as all the others)... the city made to look much like a slice of something quite organic as perhaps skin stiched together and forming a scar...
It may take a moment or two to recognise this map, but once you see what is familiar, you will ALWAYS see it.
It is this idea, this little bit of subterfuge, that I plan to incorporate in the next piece or two... I might be on to something!
Sunday, 7 November 2010
bridges/water: 1990, 2003, 2010 (2010)
ink, paper (metal and plastic frame)
6 feet x 6 feet x 6 feet (approx.)
2010
I've had my first group critique...errrm... I mean, crit (why does it bug me that people call it "crit", like they're trying to sound hip and with it but instead sound like something else...)
ANYWAY... So I've had my first crit, and somehow, I feel like I've done something not-quite-right but I can't quite put my finger on it... until I figure it out though, I won't worry about it.
In a nutshell, here is how I presented this piece:
This piece is about getting to know my new city, my first glimpses as a tourist, then settling in as a new resident. In the beginning, I am an outsider, capturing only brief moments of London, struggling to find my way around… an exciting city, it can also be dizzying, overwhelming, confusing…
It’s about getting lost and learning to find the way with the aid of familiar landmarks. It’s also about never being lost when you can see the Thames from here.
Seven years have gone by, and I’m pretty comfortable in my city now.
Time and experience give me an insider’s view… I’m not the one getting lost anymore; it must be that I’ve gained confidence - these days, strangers are asking ME for directions!
Wednesday, 27 October 2010
Three weeks in...
For my first drawing project, I started with the idea of bridges linking two halves of a city and meant to do a sort of quilt where the bridges (knots) sort of stitch the city together again...
and then I ended up somewhere altogether different with a sort of drawing that you have to get INTO to really see it...
Basically, it's a long piece of paper (12 feet/360 cm long) that is fashioned in a ring and attached to circular frame (made of wire), and suspended from above. On the inside of the ring is a drawing of London's bridges, end-to-end (so that it looks like one continuous bridge). On the outside of the ring is just blank paper - so, like I said, you have to get INSIDE from underneath to see the drawing properly - and because the ring is only 4 feet in diameter, you are forced to look at the drawing from a very close distance.
Hanging on the wall behind the ring is a 12 foot drawing of one continuous line starting at one end to the other, all squiggly-like - which sort of could pass for a pattern of moving water.
(when my phone is charged up again, I'll add a photo)
As for what it all MEANS... well... I have to think a bit more about that, because right now I'm so tired that I might just go to bed early (at 7:15PM!?)
For now though, I'll just throw a couple of words/phrases out, things I was thinking of as I was working through the project:
* time/timeline
* continuity/infinity
* bridges normally convey people/machines from one side to the next, but this one you can see but you can't get on or off - instead it just hangs there in space, a surreal and impossible bridge
* frustration/impossible, doesn't make any sense (an incomprehensible communication)
* interaction with the piece is different from the outside looking in, vs the inside looking out
* there is a definite and controlled way of viewing the piece, particularly when on the inside of it
I'm sure I could come up with more ideas but I'll stop for now...
p.s., I am utterly LOVING the course!
and then I ended up somewhere altogether different with a sort of drawing that you have to get INTO to really see it...
Basically, it's a long piece of paper (12 feet/360 cm long) that is fashioned in a ring and attached to circular frame (made of wire), and suspended from above. On the inside of the ring is a drawing of London's bridges, end-to-end (so that it looks like one continuous bridge). On the outside of the ring is just blank paper - so, like I said, you have to get INSIDE from underneath to see the drawing properly - and because the ring is only 4 feet in diameter, you are forced to look at the drawing from a very close distance.
Hanging on the wall behind the ring is a 12 foot drawing of one continuous line starting at one end to the other, all squiggly-like - which sort of could pass for a pattern of moving water.
(when my phone is charged up again, I'll add a photo)
As for what it all MEANS... well... I have to think a bit more about that, because right now I'm so tired that I might just go to bed early (at 7:15PM!?)
For now though, I'll just throw a couple of words/phrases out, things I was thinking of as I was working through the project:
* time/timeline
* continuity/infinity
* bridges normally convey people/machines from one side to the next, but this one you can see but you can't get on or off - instead it just hangs there in space, a surreal and impossible bridge
* frustration/impossible, doesn't make any sense (an incomprehensible communication)
* interaction with the piece is different from the outside looking in, vs the inside looking out
* there is a definite and controlled way of viewing the piece, particularly when on the inside of it
I'm sure I could come up with more ideas but I'll stop for now...
p.s., I am utterly LOVING the course!
Wednesday, 15 September 2010
self (2010)
16x20 inches, acrylic on canvas
Using the same limited palette as in the previous still life, I attempted a portrait with a similar “calming” effect, selecting a composition I thought would suit the limited palette, something simple and serene.
I used the same palette as in the still life:
- Titanium White
- Dioxide Purple
- Cadmium Yellow Medium
(two complementary colours)
- Payne's Gray
(all Liquitex Heavy Body)
I think this painting was successful generally as a painting goes; however, I’m not convinced that the “calming” effect was achieved as intended. On the one hand, the pose of the figure is one of quiet solitude, perhaps even she is expressing some kind of love or acceptance or self-esteem (so in that sense, the painting achieves a certain serenity...)
On the other hand, because a human figure is often dynamic by nature, and because the figure’s arms are crossed, giving diagonal (and dynamic) lines, there is still a sense of movement to the painting. Also, the strong lighting, and dark shadows against her pale skin gives a sense of drama (that was unintended but it works).
So in the final version of the painting, there is a play of dark and light, intensity and calm, joy and sadness, yet I think what the viewer may leave with is mostly light, calm and joy. The woman in the painting has come out of a dark place, perhaps a scary or unloved place, and yet has found peace, love and acceptance – in herself.
Using the same limited palette as in the previous still life, I attempted a portrait with a similar “calming” effect, selecting a composition I thought would suit the limited palette, something simple and serene.
I used the same palette as in the still life:
- Titanium White
- Dioxide Purple
- Cadmium Yellow Medium
(two complementary colours)
- Payne's Gray
(all Liquitex Heavy Body)
I think this painting was successful generally as a painting goes; however, I’m not convinced that the “calming” effect was achieved as intended. On the one hand, the pose of the figure is one of quiet solitude, perhaps even she is expressing some kind of love or acceptance or self-esteem (so in that sense, the painting achieves a certain serenity...)
On the other hand, because a human figure is often dynamic by nature, and because the figure’s arms are crossed, giving diagonal (and dynamic) lines, there is still a sense of movement to the painting. Also, the strong lighting, and dark shadows against her pale skin gives a sense of drama (that was unintended but it works).
So in the final version of the painting, there is a play of dark and light, intensity and calm, joy and sadness, yet I think what the viewer may leave with is mostly light, calm and joy. The woman in the painting has come out of a dark place, perhaps a scary or unloved place, and yet has found peace, love and acceptance – in herself.
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